Some of what God has been teaching me

This is some of what I was typing to Evelyn about tonight:

From an eternal point of view my pain is small.

I've spent hours getting to this point reading the Bible, praying, and listening to William Lane Craig and John MacArthur.

The pain is big and hard and impossible to live through without God and His perspective. I want to still serve God now and love Him. I want to make each day count. Because if it's God's will to heal me, I want to be so changed I do not want to be who I was; I want to be a better Christian, husband, father, kitchen manager, campfire leader, etc. But I need to somehow make the most of each day when I have very little to give, so when I am given more I will be faithful with the more He gives me.

Also, I've seen father/son teachable moments come and go and I can't do anything. This happens daily. I hope this is God teaching me to have a sharper eye for them and to not miss them when I have energy and can talk again.